Post-WCG Life and Theology ARCHIVES

I thank God Almighty (and I mean it) that I never joined the United Church of God. Yes, in the late 90's, I made some visits but never joined. Their reluctance to embrace the triune nature of God was a big (and mean big with a capital B-I-G) stumbling block to me and thus I never joined. One guy called Ned was pushing me to join. Let's get ONE thing straight, you PUSH me to join anything---you will very likely find me very resistant. Pure common sense.

In due time, I found out that the United Church of God is just another Armstrongist cult PRETENDING to be moderate or even liberal.

This what the UCG's approach from a website for youth on a topic which I have a strong temper for strong opinion I deeply hold. Instead of getting upset, the words in red is showing what they really think on this subject in ruthless jest.

Question: Is masturbation right or wrong? What does the Bible say about this? Is it a sin?
Answer: The Bible does not mention masturbation by name. That means we must ask some questions to apply the appropriate principles from God's Word to find His perspective on the issue.

We have to read stuff that may not be there because you teenagers and singles are too stupid to figure this out yourself!
It's obvious God created sex to be enjoyable, but what is the setting He upholds as the place for sex to occur? It's always in marriage according to what we find in the Bible. Sex outside of marriage, whether with someone who is single (called fornication) or someone who is married to someone else (called adultery), is always condemned (see 1 Corinthians 6:18 and Galatians 5:19-21). In addition, Christ said that even looking on a woman with the intent of wanting to have sex with her is a violation of the commandment against adultery (Matthew 5:27-28). So God clearly teaches that sex belongs in marriage, not outside of it.
In other words, “You are supposed to be ASEXUAL ‘til you married! No excuses whatsoever!!! Any feelings of a sexual nature MUST be CRUSHED! If necessary take many, many cold showers. If you have those feelings when you are sleeping, LOSE that SLEEP and stay awake ALL NIGHT!!! That beautiful girl you like, pray that God will deliver you from that EVIL attraction!
Sex is intended to be pleasurable, but it is obviously intended by God to be a pleasurable act that is shared between a husband and a wife. It forms a "pleasure bond," as some have described it, that helps emotionally unite the two people.
Na, na, na, na,na, na YOU CAN’T HAVE IT! Get married if you want it but if you are so horny and in a rush to be married just be prepared to lay this beatin’ on ya’,” Sex isn’t cracked up what it supposed to be!” Shut up and suffer like a good Christian! Teens and Singles you just need to be miserable and sexual frustrated before the Lord. It’s a good thing you know!

When you contrast that with masturbation (which is strictly for the pleasure of one person, whether male or female) it is obvious masturbation is outside of God's intent. It focuses on pleasing the self instead of a mate and is not the use of sex that brings the best long-term results in our lives.
What they really mean is that, “This pleasure is a temptation to lead YOU astray from the true path. It can never, never, ever be a gift from God to enjoy properly. WE SAY SO!!! Also, we feel like making this ruling, IT CAN NEVER, NEVER, EVER be a substitute in avoiding pre-marital sex!!! We are God’s representatives on earth; we can say anything we want!
As for whether masturbation is a sin or not, understanding the definition of sin can help us make that determination. One of the definitions of sin is "to miss the mark" (Vine's Expository Dictionary, art. "Sin"). Since masturbation misses the mark of what God intends for us, it is sin.
To paraphrase a double thinking former Liberal Canadian Prime Minister William Lyon MacKenzie King, “It is not sin but sinful if necessary.” It is our personal opinion given to us by God Himself that sexually relieving yourself is missing the mark. You know he loves you but if you do it he will kill you. That’s that. If you feel like you are going to explode, tell that to someone who gives a fuzz. Too damn bad. We’d rather see you become violent terrorists than to masturbate!

Now this is the time you need Bill Maher of HBO’s Real Time to ridicule this pure inhuman nonsense of what religion brings. A nocturnal emission is sometime accompanied by an erotic dream following an ejaculation of semen, the same effect of what masturbation does. Why is this okay and masturbation an indictable offense? ‘Cause religion says so! Don’t you love this mad logic (NOT)?!
Here’s a much more humane treatment of this topic from a former XCGer Harlan Simantel (who was a member of Worldwide during the 70’s) http://www.angelfire.com/or2/thelordisnear/masturbate.html and my staunch reply condemning the puritanical fantasies of the religious right and other ultra-conservatives http://www.angelfire.com/or2/thelordisnear/feed2.html. I wish Harlan would correct a grammatical error. The word should mean "boldly" not "bodily". You'll understand when you see the link.

Here is also another sensible and humane article similiar to this issue treating this topic humanely as well.http://inkaboutit.homestead.com/Lustmt528.html .